Colette Barr Heldring

COLETTE BARR HELDRING ""WORLD'S GREATEST MOTHER"" Colette Barr Heldring, beloved wife of Frederick Heldring, past chairman of Philadelphia National Bank, passed away peacefully at home surrounded by her family on the morning of March 3, 2012. She was 85 years old. Mrs. Heldring lived, in her own words, a ""charmed"" life. Born on August 29, 1926 in Chicago, Illinois to Martin James and Alice Cullen Barr, she matriculated from Chicago's Sacred Heart Academy in 1944, and held degrees from the Dominican Rosary College and Loyola University/Fribourg University (Switzerland). With wanderlust for travel, Colette met her future husband in Mexico while vacationing with her mother. Seeing her swim in the hotel pool, her future husband admired her stroke and promptly asked her to dinner. On assignment for his position at Philadelphia National Bank, he was there to hone his Spanish skills. Frederick, a dashing European from a prominent Dutch banking family, somehow convinced the conservative Mrs. Barr to allow her daughter to stay in Mexico and travel with the young banker. A whirlwind 10-day courtship followed and they were married within 6 months. In the next 10 years, they produced seven children, Martin, James, Alice Ann, Mary Carroll, Ted, Louise and Claudia and resided in Wayne, Pa, spending their summers in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. Education was a priority for Mrs. Heldring and she oft recounted a story about how she brought all of her children to Rosemont's School of the Holy Child to enroll them there. The nun in charge reminded her that children were ""individuals"" and should never be compared. She heeded the nun's advice and all 7 children were always enrolled in different schools. As her husband's career advanced at the bank, Mrs. Heldring became a much admired socialite and hostess on Philadelphia's Main Line, often generously entertaining at her ""Rock House"", or Taninul, where her three daughters were also married. She oversaw her daughters' weddings with a velvet glove, instructing the caterers that not a penny would be paid if any guest was seen carrying a beer bottle. Her children's devotion to her was legendary. When her son, Jamie, walked into a local store to have a pillow monogrammed for his mother with the words ""World's Greatest Mother"", the saleswoman replied, ""Oh, you must mean, Mrs. Heldring."" By all estimations, Mrs. Heldring led a glamorous life despite coping with crippling rheumatoid arthritis that rarely slowed her down. She was interested in everything and everybody. A student of history, she twice traveled the world with her husband, meeting Presidents, heads of state, world leaders. She even had tea at the White House with Jackie Kennedy, with whom she shared a passion for all things French. A devout Catholic, she wheeled herself to the head of the line to eagerly greet Pope John Paul II on two separate occasions. She was an ardent supporter of the Philadelphia Orchestra and a regular attendee on Friday afternoons. Well read and well spoken, she often discouraged the use of such common words as ""nice"", ""cute"" or ""good"" by her 18 grandchildren and encouraged them to improve their vocabularies. Her speech was sprinkled with whimsical sayings that have become part of the family vernacular, such as ""Glorious!"", ""Alas!"", ""Oh, deliver me!"" ""Hooray"" and ""Tra-la!"" Her enthusiasm was infectious and a seat next to ""Grandee"" at a family dinner, with those blue eyes focused only on you, was akin to a seat next to royalty. A former member of the Board of Friends of the Council of International Visitors, the Arthritis Foundation, and the Catholic Philopatrians Literary Society, Mrs. Heldring also co-chaired in the 1980's the Inglis House Benefit, the International House Ball, and the Thorncroft Ball , to name a few. Among her many activities, Mrs. Heldring was a long standing member of the St. Francis Country House Auxiliary Board and a 2004 Recipient of its prestigious Mundy Award. A Shakespearean scholar, Mrs. Heldring's acceptance speech cleverly quoted from Shakespeare warning that ""brevity thy name is not woman."" Indeed halfway through her speech, her oldest son stood up and clapped thinking that it was over. She wasn't quite done, she never was, and to a jubilant standing ovation she again quoted her favorite author: ""Joy, gentle friends. Joy and fresh days of love accompany your hearts. A fond adieu."" She is survived by her beloved husband, Frederick, whom she called ""Lovey"", her seven children and six spouses, Martin (Peg), Jamie (Geri), Alice Ann, Mary Carroll (Billy), Ted (Julie), Louise (John) and Claudia (Andy) and 18 grandchildren. Her brother, Robert Barr, predeceased her and her brother, Cullen Barr, survives her. Mrs. Heldring's viewing is on Tuesday, March 6, 2012 from 6 to 8pm only, at St. Katharine of Siena Church, 104 S. Aberdeen Ave., Wayne, PA 19087. Her Funeral Mass will be celebrated at St. Katharine of Siena Church on Wednesday, March 7, 2012 at 10:00am. Interment will follow the Mass at Calvary Cemetery, Lower Merion Twp. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made in Colette's memory to St. Francis Country House, 1412 Lansdowne Ave., Darby, PA 19023.